It can be tempting to be with what’s here, in front of us, especially when it looks better than loneliness.
I’m saying that we should have good values and we should find partners that have good values. And good values means not holding out for some image of perfection or being with for someone who’s measuring us the same way.
I’m saying you need someone who’s got their head straight and their values in the right place and wakes up each morning, looks at you in your imperfect human-being-ness and still thinks to themselves, “yeah.”
Maybe you care for each other. Or maybe you just want to care for each other. Maybe you want them, but you’d want them even more if only.
Don’t live your life that way. Don’t treat other human beings that way. And don’t let other human beings regard you that way.
Look for someone who smiles and says: “doesn’t matter, I want them.” and be that person too.
Because there will always be someone more attractive, younger, smarter, more fun, etc.
If they have been holding back on something for too long, leave. If they aren’t sure, leave. If they have reasons about timing not being ready, busy, etc. then leave.
If they really cared, they would want to risk it.
You need someone who is sure.
You need someone who chooses you, and continues to choose you.
You are a person, not a pillow. You add value as a complex and imperfect human being.
Be with someone who sees you as special, not a chore or checkbox.
Let someone else step up and do exactly what you’ve been hoping for, which is: choose you.
With whatever they have to offer.
Note: Don’t feel entitled without doing or being anything in the relationship.